Fellow parent‘s of the world
We last touched on the subject of pre-school care. I questioned what we most consider when choosing a child care provider. It would appear that for many parents the balance for necessity out ways that of quality. This is not through choice but because of the quality of service not being widely enough available. We all want the best for our children yet all to often it appears out of our reach.
Doctors currently recommend a recovery period of six weeks after delivery. Today it is more important than ever that fathers assist with raising their children. Society is breaking the family connection in stages. Current paternity leave is only two weeks. Current changes to the financial support the government offer mean that staying as a family results in less time together and financial loss.
Tax credits: effect of Budget changes from 6 April 2012 http://www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/TaxCredits/DG_194914
There are varied types of pre-school, day care available, offering a range of services. However the likelihood of finding a carer that meets your all your expectations, is affordable and within a reasonable distance to either home or work is unlikely.
A nanny may be more cost-effective if you have multiple children or both parents are in full-time employment. Negotiating flexibility is easier as you are dealing with an individual. You have more control over your child’s day and routine. Consider sleeping with a blanket and leaving that with your newborn to help them settle. Leave a recording of your voice or a short video. However this involves letting an outsider into your personal environment. Every precaution must be taken.
A childminder will look after children within their home. They will have their own timetable in place. You have less flexibility with time as they may care for multiple children of varied ages. Let us consider for a moment that we are a newborn child our strongest senses are those of sound and smell. We must now adapt the natural emotional attachments of family to support our children within society. A soft toy that plays a melody that you hum at home can help you baby settle. It provides comfort in an unfamiliar environment through smell and sound easing the transition.
A nursery provides an environment which you child can remain in until age five as many provide facilities for all age groups. Such as separate rooms for babies, crawlers and toddlers. They are usually attached or within close proximity to primary schools. Many offer a priority place to your child in the reception class. When entering reception your child will share this experience with children they are already familiar with which can assist the settling in process when entering school. We have little if any control over what takes place within this environment. This type or care is most widely available.
Ask yourself why this is? Why are they breaking this bond?
How does this help them?
A whisper can spark great change. If we as a majority begin to ask the right questions. We will begin to get the right answers. Simple action and reaction. How would you react as a manager of a nursery if parents came in and rather than request references requested to view the complaints book. It contains comments and concerns of parent’s or visitors. I have nothing but the highest praise for those professionals that perform the service out of genuine love for children but these precious individuals have become few and far between (many enter the field because work has become more available as more mothers are made to return to work). Praise is a necessary requirement for development but it’s criticism that causes reaction. If somebody comment’s on your lips being dry you buy some chap. Your concern shouldn’t be what are they doing right but what are they doing wrong and how you address the concerns in an unthreatening manner. Nobody wants to be ‘That Mother’ fearful that your child could be penalized because the staff find you pushy. Let’s look at approach.
‘So how do you punish the kids if there bad’
This type of approach will get you labeled as ‘THAT MOTHER‘
‘I understand all children can be trying at times how do you deal with misbehavior, only I would like to mimic your procedure at home to support my child’s adjustment’
Now you’re the mother who cares about making it easier on the nursery. They will feel obliged to respond to your question. It is as important for you to bond with the care giver as much as it is for your child. The response you receive will also give you a better understanding of the person giving it. Attend a visit with your child. How does your child respond to the environment. Request a meeting without your child present to present your questions.
Settling your child: http://www.guardianchildcare.com.au/content_common/pg-guardian-childcare-settling-your-child.seo
I am not proposing that we suddenly bombard those in government with demands but rather that we prick the minds of those that are dealing with our children first hand. Starting a ripple can produce a wave. If this system is to replace family care then it needs to do just that. We are the first to hear about it when our child misbehaves we are the ones as parents who receive judgment. Our connection with our children starts here and it is for us to secure it through values. Society needs to embrace family. We must get the system to support us or in another 10 years our children will be in the headlines, labeled as another lost generation. Something only remains lost if you fail to find it. It is up to us to get them to look and see.
Please see my POLLS and have your say.
Wikipedia –Primary socialization for a child is very important because it sets the ground work for all future socialization. Primary Socialization occurs when a child learns the attitudes, values, and actions appropriate to individuals as members of a particular culture. It is mainly influenced by the immediate family and friends. For example if a child saw his/her mother expressing adiscriminatory opinion about a minority group, then that child may think this behavior is acceptable and could continue to have this opinion about minority groups.